Tuesday, October 11, 2011
The night before, as we picked out his clothes and prepared him for the big day ahead, he whispered to me, "mommy, you don't need to be sad that I'm going to school... it's going to be OK." And I thought "oh no... you too?" What's wrong with these people? Now I felt like I'd be letting people down if I didn't cry!
But my emotions were the least of his worries. His excitement was nearly palpable. He could barely stand the fact that he wouldn't be going to school first thing in the morning and would have to wait till after lunch to begin his adventure. Being in afternoon Kindergarten has it's pros and cons... the waiting being the biggest con. His daddy came home to accompany us for this momentous occasion and he was thrilled for us both to share this experience with him. We walked him to his classroom, helped him put his things away and he chose a seat and sat down. As all the other parents were hovering and milling about I thought "is it really this easy?" I knelt down to give him a hug and eyed another mom looking at me nostalgically. "What's her problem?" I thought, "I'm FINE!" His smile never faltered. His daddy knelt down to hug him and I felt a small twinge in my chest. We turned to leave and he was ready to let go, excited for his new adventure.
"I did it," I thought, "no tears!"
And then it hit me. We turned around and peered through the hall window to see him sitting quietly, smiling eagerly. We waved good-bye and he waved with sheer enthusiasm. He didn't need me... and it broke my heart. I turned back around and broke into tears. And as Joe put his arm around me I thought to myself "So this is what they they were talking about... the bittersweet joy and pain of letting go..."
Good luck my big Kindergartner. You've entered the big wide world of academics and I'm going to be here for you every step of the way :)